"We're not just going to shoot the bastards, we're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks!"
-General George S. Patton
Address to troops in England, May 31, 1944
After living in Valdosta for nearly a year, my wife insisted that I join the Knights of Columbus. She was concerned that I had made no male Catholic friends since moving here and she thought it would make a difference.
I finally looked into it and soon found myself accepted into the ranks as a First Degree Knight. I attended the meetings as often as I could, but it was a struggle. The majority of men were much older than me and most of them lived a very different life than mine with drastically different interests. The two things I remember most about the Knights was the perpetually open (and packed) bar and the incredible boredom of sitting through the monthly meetings. I didn't honestly know what to expect when I joined, but I assumed it was a Catholic men's club. Well, it was, but it was, more specifically, a fundraising club whose members happened to be Catholic men.
There were some fine gentlemen in the club and everyone did their best to make me feel welcome. But after I was taken to court for my alleged "stalking" activities, a number of these men suddenly turned a cold shoulder to me. A few also remained friends and have been supportive, albeit behind the scenes--they know darned well what public support for me would result in for themselves.
After my hearing, one of my contacts in Savannah called me to tell me that I was going to be kicked out of the Knights of Columbus. Now I had already spoken to some local people here about the issue and they were trying to prepare a private meeting between myself and the leadership to permit me to address the charges made against me. That meeting never took place.
Instead, I received the letter (pictured below) informing me that I had been summarily expelled. There would be no meeting or hearing of any sort.
As I understand it, this kind of dismissal is an explicit violation of the Knights of Columbus' constitution, which grants anyone accused of such actions the right of due process. But I can understand why it was done. If those involved had given me a fair hearing, a few of them would have been presented with material that would have made them very uncomfortable and would ultimately have forced them to confront their own role as enablers of something very, very wrong.
I know who was behind this letter and I know why it was done. Kicking me out of my own parish was not enough. Any and every possible punitive action had to be taken to publicly "disgrace" me. This was just one more instance of piling on. Call it overkill.
I probably could have fought this--I probably still could. But it's not worth it to me. And I am not bitter.
Some of my friends have tried to support me by sending me emails about the failures of the Knights of Columbus, but like any other group, you take the good with the bad. Sure, there are Knights who have disgraced themselves by publicly supporting pro-abortion politicians or homosexual marriage, but then again, it's just as disgraceful for ANY Catholic to support such things. There are also a lot of Knights who do a lot of good work and raise a lot of money for good causes.
And there are a few Yellow Knights, who, from a misguided sense of loyalty, pulled off my expulsion without ever having the guts to face me. I still see some of these guys once in a while and they still don't even have the moral fiber to look me in the eye. Big surprise.
By and large, the Knights seem to be a pretty decent group. God bless 'em, it just wasn't my thing.
Besides, I'm "dangerous".
11 comments:
As Catholic organizations go, the issue of the Knights is a complicated one.
*However*, one thing that's been very clear since 2002 is how the Knights, like the Legion of Christ, have a dangerous policy of not criticizing the Church.
I've often compared your situation to that of Fr. James Haley in Arlington. One of the scandals Fr. Haley was involved in was a pastor who allegedly embezzled a great deal of money and definitely lived a rather luxurious lifestyle for a priest (allegedly, this pastor has been cleared of allegations by diocesan and IRS audits).
One of the things that scandalized Fr. Haley was a giant-sized television installed in the rectory--supposedly for the purposes of religious education (but in the rectory living room)--by the KofC. The KofC in Arlington strongly supported Bishop Loverde contra Fr. Haley and threatened any members who spoke out in Fr. Haley's defense.
There are alot of good men that are Knights in Valdosta. Unfortunately, they don't read their Catechism. They followed the pseudo-catechism of censored. They started drinking Kool-aid by the gallons in the late 90's.
The Knights, of which I am one,can and do carry out worthwhile activities.
But this does not excuse overlooking the "laws" of the Order. I encountered a Fourth Degree Knight who was equally proud of being a 32nd Degree Mason. This was in the Diocese of Orange, California, where other things are happening regularly to make a person wonder what's going on.
I don't know what you did, or failed to do, that landed you in Valdosta, but I hope there is an escape.
I live in Valdosta because I am a California real-estate refugee. It's just too darned expensive to live in San Diego anymore and if you can't afford to live here, you won't make it anywhere.
It's not just the Catechism that is ignored and not read. I remember telephoning the Knights of Columbus in OC California to get their support for our troubled Diocese of Orange. Bishop Tod D. Brown sent out a Diocese memo to all of the priests supporting Fr. Gerald Coleman's, (Church dissenter)support for homosexual civil unions. I was told to call the head Knight for the area to discuss the matter. When I asked this gentleman if he had heard of Michael Rose's book "Goodbye Good Men" he replied, "Oh I'm not much of a reader but my wife is"!
This took place at the onset of the horrific sex abuse scandals. I thought that the Knights of Columbus would want to defend the Church against assaults but I learned very fast that they run like the wind when it comes to confronting the evil that is being perpetrated from within the Church.
I wanted to ask this Knight if his wife could read the book "Goodbye Good Men" and educate him but I was too afraid to hear an even more disappointing response.
Fundraising is good but defending the faith is more important than strutting feathers to sell candy bars. Charity starts at home and the Knights need to charitably weed out the dissenters within their own group and those who seek to destroy the church from within.
Too bad the "K" doesn't stand for the word "Know" and the "C" stand for the word "Catechism" as in "Know the Catechism and Defend It" like a True Knight in shining armour!
I too looked into joining the KOC, but found them an order whose time has come and gone. I agree they do perform valuable charitable services.
If it's developing Catholic male relationships that you need, than you might consider the Catholic Men's Fellowship.
http://www.cmfpitt.org/default.aspx
I joined our local parish chapter and find the meetings a breath of fresh air. We meet weekly for 90 minutes and study the bible and discuss the faith and how we each manage the day to day struggles of being Catholic in a secular world. It's a great way to strengthen your own faith, as well as to build the others within the group. I can't think of a meeting where I haven't come away having learned something about my faith.
Kumpel,
you maybe dangerous, but you are funny as hell. Is that you in the Black Knight uniform?
my friend is a mailman in San Diego and has 7 children. To claim the cost of living in San Diego is too high, is hard to accept when the primary breadwinner in a household is a doctor. Most doctors I know in San Diego make over $200,000 a yr.
Really? Even on THAT salary, do you have any idea how much housing is in San Diego?
When my wife finished residency, new physicians could expect starting salaries of $80,000 to 100,000 per year. They call that the "sunshine tax" --you should be willing to accept less to live in San Diego.
Add to that four years of undergrad student loans and 4 years of med school loans (my wife was the ONLY student in her med school class who did not come from a wealthy family), add in the expense of two children, buying a house (we had rented until we moved here) malpractice insurance, etc--it's virtually impossible.
Perhaps your "friend", the alleged mailman, bought his house before the prices got so ridiculous. The first ten years we were married, the average cost of a house in San Diego went from $150,000 to $460,000--and that was the MEDIAN cost, meaning that you get a piece of junk in the suburbs with a long commute.
I would also be curious if this mailman and his wife both work. We have made the sacrifice of living in a less desirable place because we did not want our children to be raised by day care centers and after school activity supervisors. We prefer to raise them ourselves.
Research your numbers before you jump to the old "all doctors are rich" conclusion.
(BTW--I'll tell you the fastest way to stop the escalation of health care costs: CAP malpractice awards. Attorneys have done more to make your medical bills higher than any other group)
Robert--I know it's off topic, but you're absolutely right. In real estate, there are "caps" for how much a realtor can be sued for. I forget all the numbers, and that was the rules for Virginia when I took the class in 2001. But there is a certain amount of insurance the realtor has to have. Then there's a pool from which any realtor can draw, if necessary. If the same realtor has multiple suits, each plaintiff can only get a set maximum.
Another way to do it, as you point out, would be to cut the unnecessary costs of medical school. IMO, anyone who's getting a technical degree at a community college, anyone who's getting a teaching degree, and anyone who's studying medicine should get a free education, or at least 0-interest student loans.
That would solve a lot of our country's financial problems.
I am sure there are cheaper places than Valdosta to live. God willing you will be able to find one of those places soon. It is a shame to be punished in this way - esp. for your kids.
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